I finally thought i'd make myself a Blog.
After some thought i came up with some answers on why i'm shy.
A few weeks ago i went to a Bar for the First time, some Forum i'm a member of Decided to have a Meeting there so i gathered up some courage and decided to go.
Before i go on i have to mention that i made a friend ( not really ) on the forum. She was Female... :O
Yeah sounds exciting and all, but it really isnt.
Anyways, i added her on MSN and chatted around about Anime and J-Dramas. She even suggested some for me.
One of the ones she Suggested to me wasnt all so good because it seemed like a low budget crappy acting Drama...
Well as any person i told her i didnt really like it much for the reasons i wrote above...
SHE WENT MAD...
She suddenly started typing in a completely different way, in a more serious frightening way as if she snapped, as if you told her that her mother is a whore or something.
She started an E-Fight on MSN asking why i hated it, telling me that i'm a stubborn person as well as telling me a lot of other stuff.
Anyway that was the First time she snapped and i talked it through with her for about an hour of MSN chatting trying to calm her down.
Now back to the Bar Meeting.
As i said it was my first time to a Bar even though i'm 21 Years Old.
Now as i was walking towards the Bar i was walking towards her, and she was walking towards me as if we were on a Date, it was a weird feeling.
Before i went there, a few days back on MSN she told me she broke up with her Boyfriend so i went there with the thought that it could possibly mean the start of a good relationship.
Anyway we stand in front of eachother and we say : Hi to each other.
We both Immediatelly knew who we were...
We sat outside the Bar setup some chairs for the people who were gonna come afterwards... at this point people from the Forum started flowing in. Did some Handshakes with them said a Hi and left them alone since as it seemed, they came as a Group of Friends, you can say that they had their own gang.
Moving along... Another gang of 17-18 year olds flows in, one of them Recognises me from one of my Youtube Videos where i was playing the Guitar Naked and says : I'm a Big Fan.
After discussing that for around 5 minutes, there's nothing else to talk to him about.
So i go into my little corner and go in Silent Mode.
At this point there's 20 people around me, and they all have their own Gang. Except me and the Girl from the beggining. We talked about some Anime heard some of her Music on her Ipod.
And slowly tried to get Close to her on our Common / Shared Subjects.
Then the Shit happens... A guy comes randomly and sits next to her. They start talking, shoving me out of the conversation.
Then i see them Kissing and Cuddling in FRONT OF ME.
WTF? Oooooh she's one of those Girls that Break up one day and Makup the next day.
Ah ok anyway. Now that that guy is there's no chance for anything, my hopes for anything are lost, and talking to her was a bit hard since she's constantly doing stuff with that guy.
What am i gonna do now?
Everyone around are Friends IRL and i'm just a guy who signed up on their Forum and am just a Forum Member, even though i'm one of the most known members, i'm still not one of their IRL friends.
So after some time passes and i'm drinking my second Large Pint of Beer....... OOH i hate beer btw. I also hated the beer i was drinking, the only reason i ordered a Second Large Pint was because i drank the First one too fast, i was the only one to drink it too fast.
Then everyone had a beer in front of them Except me.
Normally i wouldnt get a second but upon a moment of weakness i ordered another one.
Back to the part where i just drank my Second Large Pint of Beer, i Cross my hand and start looking around. Literally i'm looking around in Circles, the Beer got to me, i felt like when you Wake up in the Morning and have your eyes Wide Open, you cant Concentrate on one spot you just look around.
I'm like oh crap this is what being drunk is like? I wonder how people even think of Driving home.
Then the Shitty Fake Natchos Come.
The consisted of one of those Crappy Chip / Natcho Packs you get at supermarkets. The Packets they sell here and extremely smaller than the ones you can get in other countries. Possibly half Sized. They were the Standard Natchos Sold in the Supermarket, and let me say there's only one brand to buy here and they are CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP.
The Natchos came in a hot platter ( More like a plate ) with melted Chese and supposedly what was the sauce which wasnt to cover your Small Finger Nail if you put your finger in it.
I eat up some Natchos which quickly get cold and the Chese becomes like plastic and shit, obviously trying to Dip them in the so called sauce is impossible so i just eat up before they get eaten, then i just give up, it's too disgusting to eat plastic.
Aaaanyway...
At this point i tied my hands and just sat there looking at everyone talking to each other, i tried starting small talk with some of the people there on random bullshit Subjects of possible Common interest, but they only lasted for around 15 seconds or so...
So at this point there's nothing else to do everyone is having fun with their IRL friends and all, some BITCH, yes.... a BITCH came next to the guy sitting next to me and Sat on his Lap.
Oh snap... Not this kind of situation again...
She sat on his lap with her back to me. What was worse was that the Chairs were very very close, so her back was touching me and there was nowhere to move to.
Imagine a Situation where you have your hands tied and there's a Girl sitting on the lap of the guy next to you.
To add to that i've never had a relationship before so you propably cant imagine my feelings about these kind of situations.
It's like : Why him and not me?
Having my hands tied for the past 1 and a half hour i get very bored of those 15 second chit chat sessions. These Sessions happaned like 5-6 times in a 4 hour Period so it was a very boring night.
I did my best to stay there for as long as possible and not to leave from the bar like the Emo-Kid that didnt talk much. But enough is enough, i payed my Beer Bill and Just left, no one really cared when i said: Bye.
Went home and left it all behind.
Over the next couple of weeks that Girl started a couple more E-Fights for the exact same reasons, i couldnt take her MSN bullshit anymore and just Blocked her. The last thing i need is some psycho bitch who likes to fight and talk things through for hours, making me nervous over MSN.
She sent me some Messages on Facebook and i blocked her there as well. She was asking if i block people everytime they piss me off.
I sent her one of those long detailed replies and just blocked her. Cant be bothered with such people anymore, i've had enough experiences with them.
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